Posted on

How to start believing in yourself

   I’ve written a lot about different topics over the years on this site. Most of them have transformed my life in one way or another, and that is why I share them. (And why I consider them worth sharing to begin with.) But there are some topics that I know in my heart that I want to address, but hold off on. I know I’m not an expert, on anything really. But if I’m going to write a post on a topic, it has to be something that I’ve at least made some headway on, and if it’s a technique, then it has to be something that I’ve seen help or work, at least on someone if not myself. 

   All this to say that I’ve been waiting on this idea of believing in yourself to become a post on The Thoughts that Bind. Until recently, I really hadn’t thought it over much, how I see it affecting myself and the people that I know in my daily life. And I had very few ideas as to how to combat having a lack of personal confidence. I’ve learned how to practice loving myself. How to challenge my initial self-hatred. But believing in myself? Well, that’s a whole new step. But due to some recent realizations, I’m breaking that silence about the topic now. 

Continue reading “How to start believing in yourself”
Posted on

How to reminisce without making yourself sad

   I want you to sit down for a moment. Now, take a deep breath and remember a time when you felt truly at peace, happy, or excited. You can even close your eyes if you want. Really get into the memory. What were you seeing? Feeling? What about who you were with? Was it hot outside? Try to work up a really vivid memory. And once you have open your eyes. 

Continue reading “How to reminisce without making yourself sad”
Posted on

How to trick yourself into getting things done

   So, I’m a chronic over-thinker. I plan until I’m blue in the face, psyching myself out until I don’t even want to take action anymore. Even when I know I need to. Sometimes it works, giving me extra perspective and time to work out how I feel about things. But sometimes (often enough) it doesn’t. And that’s what I want to talk to you about today. 

Continue reading “How to trick yourself into getting things done”
Posted on

Why are we ashamed? (And shame vs. guilt)

   A while back, I wrote about a post entitled “I’m embarrassed about my past (dealing with shame and guilt)”. And if you haven’t read that one, or don’t remember it, I suggest you check it out because it’s a good one. (You can find it here.) But I wanted to pick up from there today, because after that, you may still be wondering, “Okay, but why is it I feel so ashamed?” And that is a really good point. 

Continue reading “Why are we ashamed? (And shame vs. guilt)”
Posted on

How to discover (and build) your true self

   So recently, we talked about our personal identity. How we pick it up, and how to dismantle the inauthentic parts of ourselves. (If you didn’t read that one, you can find it here.) But once you’ve become aware of the parts of yourself that don’t feel authentic and let them go, how do you discover who you really are, and build up your identity? And so we’re picking the subject back up today. Here’s how to start discovering yourself. 

Continue reading “How to discover (and build) your true self”
Posted on

Your personal best

   Today I want to talk to you about the idea of “doing your best”. It’s so problematic, because it’s so subjective. Some of us will make very little effort towards something, but then claim we did our best, because we know that people can’t technically argue with that. While still others use it as an excuse to judge themselves harshly for not being better at (insert whatever goal here) yet and burn themselves out in the process. So how are we supposed to find out what our real best is, and actually do it?

Continue reading “Your personal best”