Get obsessed about something!

   Hello and welcome back to the Thoughts that Bind. If you’re new here, welcome! On this site we like to talk a lot about what you can do to improve yourself and make your life more fulfilling. And today, our subject is a little bit of both. Although it might seem a little sensational, what I’m telling you is to go ahead and get obsessed with something. In fact, it could be one of the best things you can do for your life right now. 

Okay, obsession’s bad

   I understand that there are definitely levels of obsession which are unhealthy, as well as certain things that an obsession with is unhealthy, like people or drugs, for example. So no, I’m not making a case for how unhealthy obsession is good, actually. Please avoid unhealthy obsessions like the plague. Addictions are insidious, stalking is not okay, and OCD is not fun or quirky. In this sense of the word, obsession is something to inherently be avoided. I would also like to add that in many of these cases, moderation is also not the solution. If obsession with an unhealthy habit is a life sucker, than a moderate interest in unhealthy habits is more of an appetizer to the former and a dangerous distraction, at best. 

   That being said, obsession with positive things in a more colloquial usage of the word can be a healthy behavior. It could even be one of the best things you could partake in currently. If there’s one thing that has spurred on human progress and creativity, it’s obsession. Sometimes in an unhealthy sense, while in others, more of a passionate sense. We do have to remember that the greats (as well as infamous people) of history had a propensity to obsess over things, and to be quite passionate about the world around and within them. If we can learn to channel that strong life force in a positive way, it can be the antidote to many a problem of modern numbness or crushing mediocrity that we feel deep down inside. But how?

Identity

   For young people, the question of identity can be kind of a slippery one. Even for mature adults, it can be difficult to know who we are if we feel like we haven’t explored much in our life. Engaging in passionate learning on any subject that catches your fancy can help you discover more about yourself. About who you are, and who you’re on your way to becoming. Gaining hobbies and new experiences can show you talents you didn’t know you had. Not to mention new favorite things that you otherwise never would have found. It’s like going down the rabbit hole of life force itself, and partaking in all those things that make it truly interesting.

 We learn through novelty and play. So it shouldn’t come as a surprise that getting into a niche topic has a way of reactivating your brain in new ways that not only cut through monotony, but also give us a developing sense of who we are. This sort of behavior can help you change yourself even when you have felt stuck and stagnant for years. 

Coping with life

   Not only does obsessing over a new subject help you shift your identity and life situation (or mature in the roles you’ve already taken), but it can also help you cope with less than ideal life situations or internal emotional problems. While it’s not good to engage in continued emotional evasion, obsessing over a hobby or study can help you feel more in control of the direction of your life when things just seem to be happening to you beyond your control. 

   Also, throwing yourself into something you are passionate about has a way of keeping you from comparing your life to others’. When we engage in toxic comparison, what we are often sensing is a lack of interest in our lives. We feel we lack direction and intrigue, and everyone else seems so happy and successful and beautiful. What do we really have? It’s certainly healthy to realize that we’re not where we want to be in life and want to do something about it. Let’s strive to be constructive with ourselves. However, you know that feeling when your life just starts to feel lackluster. Finding a new obsession and becoming an expert can help you inject that feeling of “something’s happening in my life” and pair it with the self-esteem of becoming an expert about something. Also, quite frankly, it can be used as a distraction from these toxic swirling thoughts that come with either life trials or personal insecurities. 

Improving your skills

   So, where does the self-esteem come from with putting your all into an obscure passion? Well, it’s the expertise you build. The more time and effort you invest into something, the more you’ll know about it and the better you’ll get. This feeling can be quite addictive, but in a positive way. When you build your skills, you’re turning yourself into more of an expert, more of an authority on something. Not to mention, you’re giving yourself more options in life. More ways of being. 

   A person who starts up home cooking as a hobby is more likely to eat delicious and nutritional meals on a regular basis, as well as have recipes to share with loved ones at social gatherings. An athletic person has an increased physical aptitude which benefits their health as well as endurance if they want to help a friend move or need to walk a long distance. Someone who learns a language will be able to take a job in a different country that doesn’t speak their native language. The more you learn, the more options you have and opportunities you can accept. That’s just the simple fact. Now, clearly some skills are more useful and versatile than others. However, the point still stands—the opportunities that you can accept come from the skills and knowledge you have at any given time. Taking your free time to build a skill and a knowledge base in a specific area gives you more opportunities, even in imperceptible ways.

Having fun

   While it is very prudent to look at the practical side of obsessing over something specific, it’s also important to point out that it’s a whole lot of fun. It’s interesting to have interests. It keeps life weird and rich and full. And it keeps you from going on autopilot or taking things too seriously. If you’re always wrapped up in something kinda weird and silly, you’ll know that you’re not always going to be great at something. (And definitely not on the first try.) This gives you the freedom to laugh at yourself a little bit, or at the very least, try things anyway even though you know you might look a little silly. 

   Opening up to obsessions gives you permission to play again, even in your adult life. It allows you to put your day-to-day worries aside and focus on the miracle that is this life. Every day that we wake up and breathe is a gift, and spicing it up with fun brain candy (no matter how odd it may seem to others), helps us appreciate that gift all the more. 

Saving the world (or at least doing your best)

   The truth is, you cannot save the world on your own. This is something that we all know. But what we often fail to realize is just how big of an impact one person can make. Getting obsessed with things is one of the ways you can make the world a better place. Obviously, if you’re learning about social problems and how to not contribute to them (even how to work towards solving them in some cases), you will be helping to make the world a better place. You can get obsessed with volunteering for homeless shelters, nursing homes, hospitals, animal rescues. That would be pretty neat. Or get obsessed with activism, raising awareness on big issues in this world and aiding others to change. 

   But even if you’re not going to fix the world with your newest passion, you can still make the world a much brighter place. I think about people who teach cooking or dance or art classes, comedians and actors, online content creators who just frankly make us smile. The fact is, this world needs more kind, passionate, vivacious people. You can be one of them by truly letting yourself explore and get excited about whatever it is that makes your heart sing. You can make people smile with your new skills, you can teach people how to get into your hobby, you can connect over a shared love of your medium. And you can encourage others to live a life that’s bright and full and real. Seeing somebody in their element and loving life is one of the greatest encouragements that exist in this world to say “Hey, you! It’s okay. You can go ahead and be yourself.” In that way, you kind of can help save the world.

Our inhibitions

   It’s really common to feel inhibited around getting really passionate about one subject or another. Perhaps we worry about getting made fun of or criticized for choosing the wrong thing. Or that we’ll look dorky being passionate about something that others deem silly. After all, most of us had the experience as children of being teased for wearing the wrong style or liking something weird or being too nerdy. For some, that experience even bled into adulthood. But it’s the very people who will make fun of you that are the most unhappy and unfulfilled people you will meet. 

   We think we are protecting ourselves when we dull our shine, because we are trying to evade their ridicule. And you know what? We may even succeed. (Often enough not, because these people tend to just find something else to criticize. However, sometimes if you’re very careful and very quiet, it can work.) But who wants to live that way? Are you willing to give up everything that can be interesting and special in your life just to not get mean comments from nasty people? I hope not. 

   The truth is, this world needs your sparkle. And it’s through exploring and enjoying your passions that you hone it, discover more pieces of it, and ultimately encourage others to do the same. Life is truly a beautiful place when we allow it to be full and vibrant. But we need to be brave. We need to be ourselves. And we need to follow that inner call that says “ooh, that’s interesting. Let me learn a little bit about that.” This is how we stay young at heart, connected to the world around us at large, and it’s how we sew our own inner peace and joy. So water the flower of who you are, and don’t let people tell you it’s silly.