Yes, you read that right! The Thoughts that Bind home office is packing up and moving cross county! My household has been preparing for this move for a while and while it’s still a little surreal, we are so excited to be navigating reality from a new location lens.
When you move, there is a lot more going on than meets the eye, especially if you’re not doing it mindfully. Trust me, there are a lot of moving parts. And that’s something that I’d like to cover this week.
Decluttering
Having to physically carry all your possessions from one place to another will make you wonder if it’s necessary to have so many of them. For this reason, many people may feel the urge to downsize before they move. I can’t say I’m any different.
Although this is not my first rodeo with decluttering, the urge to do so is definitely as strong as the first time. (To catch up on my own decluttering journey, you can start off with my “Can a Slob Change?” series and follow it up with my decluttering chaser.) And as I’m going through all my stuff all over again, each item makes me ask the question, “Is this something that I want to take into my new life?”
Honestly, more often than I would like to admit, the answer is no. We keep so many things because we think we’re going to need them, we’re going to use them, or that someday we may want to look back on certain times in our lives.
But memories don’t live in our things. And even though we can hold onto the vestiges of our past, it’s time to start asking if we really want to. When our homes become more like museums, are we really allowing for our lives to flow and change? Are we really doing everything in our power to embrace our personal growth and evolution?
At a certain point I would argue that no, we’re not. Keeping all this old junk constantly brings us back to who we’ve always been. And it’s not that we don’t have a choice to express differently now, but if most of our things remind us of the past, it’s almost like having someone looking over your shoulder asking you, “are you sure? Don’t you remember who you used to be? Wasn’t that easy and convenient?” As someone who is actively trying to grow and improve in many areas, I certainly don’t want that.
Cleaning house
One thing you need to do before moving out is make sure the place is as clean as possible. Perhaps your space is on the market being viewed by others, or you just need it to be scrubbed clean for whoever will get it next. For many, if you’re renting, your space being dirty will cost you money after you’re gone, and nobody wants to have to pay out just because they were too lazy to wipe the mirrors.
As for us, we’re cleaning as we go, even more so than usual. People stop by to see our apartment, and sometimes it’s during a day when we have plans, so we want to make sure we’re prepared. But living in such a clean space for these past few weeks has been really motivating.
I realize that when my space is clean, I have less distractions, less worries, and more time for the things that I want to do with my day. Cleaning things up, and keeping them that way has brought me a real sense of freedom. So much so that I will do my best to carry it over to the new home. Obviously I will slip up over time, but in general, I’m hoping to keep up with this good habit.
Making room for the new
The flip side of decluttering is realizing that our new place is going to require new possessions that we don’t yet have, at least to some extent. Some things are included that we don’t have now, and vice versa. So as some items become obsolete, others all of a sudden become necessities.
This is the case in many life changes, we need to re-evaluate some of our perspectives on what is important to have. As our needs change, so should our possessions. We use our things as tools, to help us get through life more smoothly, and add more meaning to it. If your things aren’t useful anymore to you and your life, get rid of them.
But the flip side is that as your needs change, as your life changes, you are going to have to consider buying new things, things that you thought you would never need or want in the past. And that’s okay. Because you’re shifting through time, and each season brings something new and different to the mix.
A small bit of advice when it comes to taking on new possessions: do your homework. Try to really figure out if you do in fact, need or want this new thing. Figure out what kind will work best for you and if it will last. You don’t want to have to try out five different kinds of a new thing before you find one that actually works for you. And if you’re environmentally conscious, consider buying secondhand at thrift stores, consignment shops or from people you know. If you don’t need to put more waste out onto this planet, then don’t.
Expecting change
One really lovely part of moving your whole life to a new place is the forced perspective. You really don’t know what your life is going to look like in this new place and time, and there’s sort of a freedom in that. A creative spirit, if you will.
It’s important for us to learn to be flexible in our identities over time. The next segment of your life may yield something completely different than this last one, and so the roles you take on may be entirely different than you’re used to. That’s okay.
You have no obligation to be someone your former self would recognize. Each of us, over the course of our lives, will take on many different phases. Moving almost forces you to understand and accept this for what it is. And when allowing for a completely new life to come find you, allow yourself to become a completely new person.
Re-evaluating priorities
When we embrace our new settings and identities, new needs will arise. And from those, new priorities emerge as well. There is no way to completely anticipate every new need you’ll have with this new life, but it isn’t necessary anyway.
Do try to make a plan, for as much of your anticipated needs as possible. For the ones that you can’t predict, work out a system of being honest and open with yourself and your support system about the new needs arising in you. Work to communicate these needs with the necessary people, and work to get them met with the necessary frequency.
Learn to expect changes in your priorities with each life change. A new living arrangement, new job, new friends or additions to the family will all bring changes in your priorities, and it’s quite normal and healthy.
Keeping a continual scrutiny of your priorities is a great way to embrace the stage of life you’re in. This way, you remain more present, you enjoy your real life more, and you make more memories for the future. It’s a structured, responsible thing, but it’s a real win-win.
Searching out new options
And with all of this new, we find ourselves looking around at the new area, exploring. All of a sudden, we find ourselves more game to try a restaurant we’ve never heard of, or to go out for a walk just because. We’re looking for things we’ve never seen before, because we’ve designated this place as “new”. Thus, we acknowledge that our old experiences may not be incredibly relevant for existing in this new place.
And this fresh perspective on life is absolutely beautiful. It’s a wave that you should ride out as long as it lasts, and attempt to milk it for all it’s worth. You see, it’s this more open perspective that is truly the realization of the freedom and vast existence of options that we truly have in our lives. It’s highlighted by the fact that we’re in a new place, so we’re more prone to letting our old patterns of living and thinking fall by the wayside, at least for a while.
But you know, you don’t have to move out of your home to have a new lease on life. All of these aspects of moving are things that we can choose to take on at any given time, to help with our own perspectives about our life, purpose, and identity.
Life, when we choose to embrace it and run at it with full force, is this crazy awesome thing full of more possibilities than any of us tend to give it credit for on a daily basis. This wide open, world is your oyster, who will I be now, kind of feeling is accessible every day of your life if you choose to tune into it.
So, what’s really going on around you? How can you engineer you home to reflect who you’re becoming today? And just who is it that you’re becoming? Answer these questions for yourself, and do so frequently, in order to maintain that spark in your life, and that beauty in how you see the world around you (and within you).
Fun article to read. Congratulations!